Thursday, September 4, 2008

Today?Wasn't it yesterday?OR was it the day before?

I hate

Well..not completely.

My daily routine as of now.(in detail :p)
-Wake up.
-Help mum with breakfast.
-Wake my broz.
-Eat breakfast.
-Read book.
-Bathe..think what to wear while doing so.
-Get dressed to work.(face cream,legs cream..clothes,brush my hair,put on my lotion,powder my face,a lil bit of crayon :p and finally spritz some perfume)
-Leave house...lock the door and gate.
-Enter my car.
-Turn on the radio.
-Turn on the aircond.
-Lock the door if it doesn't get locked.
-Cram in between cars on the road.
-Pray hard there is atleast one parking space left in the open carpark behind the client building.
-Enter the carpark.
-Park my car.
-Turn off the engine.
-Lock the steering.
-Lock the door.
-Turn on the alarm.
-Walk towards the building.
-Call my bf who is still soundly asleep.
-Take the lift up.
-Tag myself at the main door.
-Tag myself at the Consultant Lab door.
-Take out my latop.Turn it on.
-Take out my mouse, LAN cable and power adapter.
-Connect the LAN cable and mouse.
-Connect the power adapter.
-Log into my laptop.
-Log into Ms Outlook.
-Launch many other stuff :p
-Pack my stuff.Tag myself out of the building.
-Pay the parking ticket while praying hard i have enough change.
-Drive home.
-Wash my hands,face and feet.
-change into comfy clothes.
-Eat dinner.
-Clean up table.

Well,not gonna bore u anymore...
i'm bored typing the boring routines already *sighhhh*

Anyhow, i juz wanna say that somethings are TOO routinely(is there such word?) done that we tend to not know whether i've done it today or not.

E.g. I went to the loo juz now..had to tag myself out and stuff...but i don't remember taggin myself in before that juz coz i've done it every single day.
Everytime i leave the seat, i wonder if i've packed all my stuff into my bag.
Everytime i locked my car and walk away...i wonder if i've already really locked my car...or was it yesterday that i did so.
Urgh....signs of ageing? I don't think so.
Signs of too repeatedly done? Absoloutely YES!

The good thing about doing routine stuff is...u're familiar with them and tend to do it well....
As for my trouble about not being productive at my previous role...

i found a quote for myself :

"While you are crossing the chasm, you are unproductive because you are in unfamiliarterritory." - Joe Walker -


I believe itz true but i tend to forget sometimes.....

Happened when i was 14. A group of senior picked on me. A girl is the bus said things about me. A very odd-looking guy is the bus is hitting on me and singing my name; i find it very embarrassing. A 12-year-old boy was into me that he gets red everytime i pass by. So odd.

Conclusion : Wasn't the time of my life and i sooo didn't feel like going to school. Told a lil to my parents...juz the teeny weeny bit.

My dad's advice : Things will be solved on its own.
My thoughts when he said that : What?Do nothing and it gets solved?
My actions : I did nothing but walk like i normally do..where ppl who doesn't me too well will say that i'm arrogant..but anyhow,that is juz my way off keeping funny ppl off my way. :)

My current situation (which is weeks ago)
I got into another role in another project. Sort of a role i wanted to get my hands on.I thought i could do well...but i believe i did not; produced hardly any outcomes at all :(Anyhow, i was initially happy that i got the chance to work with a bunch of seniors. I foresee myself learning more than anyone else around me. Plus, this project is sort of one-of-itz-kind and there are getting it patented..and im proud to say im part of it.

However, things didn't go so well; didn't really bond well with the team mate im supposed to work with..i see that she's too rough and at times to harsh...and it is already demotivating me enough that i'm not productive. To have someone pick on u and make u look even worse in front of others collapsed my motivation even more.This went on for many weeks til i ended up counting the number of weeks i have left til i roll-off from this project.

Well, i normally don't count unless it is not making me feel comfortable anymore. My supervisor,i understand her situation so i truly understand the times when she got pissed. :My boyfriend, he tend to tell me some solutions i could take but anyhow,i didn't do it coz i either do not have the gutz to do it or i don't want things to get i did all my way.
Here'z what i did...i tried to lower down my temper and not think too much about her remarks. I tried talking to her nicely and i tried my very best not to bug her.

The result : She apologized.
Rationale : Don't do anything. Did i propose anything?No. I guess i played her game with juz 1 less point if u get what i mean. She wants to win, let her win. There's nothing as the grand prize anyway. :p So why bother rite? I'm no longer a kid so for those who wants to act like one...up2u. I do not have time for this. I have other objectives in life.
Present situation : We are better friends...well i guess it is juz harder for 2 stubborn ppl to bond that easily.

Some things in life could be simple.I said SOME...not ALL.

Guess my dad's advice is applicable and it is not impossible esp when it is a prob which is not too big.Well, if u wanna be smarter, u definitely gotta do somehting. The knowledge won't just fall from the sky for you to answer your exam questions. That's for my broz who thinks that they could do well w/o reding a single word a day. *sigh*

Saturday, August 16, 2008


You can start counting the times i have smiley as my title or part of my title :p
Not that im super happy or something good has happened but ive heard some stuff which could help me bring back my self-esteem to the level it was at before it went down the drain.

On my way back from work today, i've had some lines breing refreshed in my mind. *Yea...i was driving and slightly dreaming*

Here are few nice stuff people had said to me which made me feel....nice...or made me realize that im not too bad....*my pessimism kills sometimes :(

"I love your skin. It is so soft" (i'm a girl...besides that, thanks to the amount of lotion i've spent my money on)

"Wow.Is this your handwriting?Wow.Soooo neat." (i really dun think so)

"The best smile is in your smile" (sweet...teehee)

"OMG.Soooo nice....u should really sing....OMG." (i dun think so...)

"Do us a favour. Save us all and be the emcee" (i dun think im that gewd.. :)

"All the girls i know are dumb but u're different.u're smart.." (am i?i dunno..i dun think so)

"Ur eyes are beautiful" (tq.i hope so too)

"I love ur eyes" (i love urs too honey ;) )

"So nice. I like your handwriting." (i dun think it looks nice...)

"Wow.Beautiful nails." (yea..coz itz shape is pretty long..and not squarish...thanks)

"Have u been emceeing for long? U're so good" (Really?Hmm...i dunno & no i never emceed b4)

"She's msian but she has butt and boobs" (Pretty bold..but maybe i have those coz im not thin)

See.U dun have to be beautiful. U dun have to be perfect. U just have to be yourself. :)
Well, im not at the top of my self-esteem but these lil things that ppl say to me sounds nice and could make my day a lil. Thanks peeps.

Sunday, August 10, 2008

Many Floors Down

This post has nothing related to floors or buildings or any structures at all. Read on if u feel like reading crappy criticisms.

First off. I don't and won't say something is good unless it is really good....I can be easy to please or impossible to please. I won't simply agree with that ppl say. I won't simply acknowledge something. I won't simply like what everybody likes. Anyhow, all the above mentioned scenario would be the opposite only when i'm too tired to think or the issue is too minor to get through my system. :p

Here are some stuff i saw over the weekends. A girl...who i thought was a negro...someone says she's pretty and guyz like girls like her. First look, she's small.As in super small. Her body is just right for her structure but her legs look like i think she has to put some flesh to the sticks to make it looks like legs. No. She's not pretty. How can the adjective for face be mapped to body? It is like saying the house is pretty because it happens to be facing a shopping mall. Her hair is straight and no it is not natural. Its rebonded. How is that pretty? I dunno. It was well cut. So she earns a point there. I dunno why i see things ppl do not see and at times i think of things that doesn't even cross anybody's in they never think until that extent i could reach. No im not a genious...juz that my creativity is elsewhere and my imaginations could get wild. The final thing i saw on thet girl was....on one of her stick-lookin leg, there's a scar...a white one. Since she's dark as in DARK...BLACK...the scar was super seen...and no. Ppl do not see that coz they were blinded but the petite body and lil clothes. See ppl. U juz gotta focus to see things sometimes. No imagination required. Btw, here's what i also know about her. She talks like as if she's in a marketplace. LOL! Saw and heard it myself when she happened to drop by the table of introvert people i was sitting at. Another news....she barely has professionalism in here. I'll keep the disgusting details to myself.K? So guys, it is not just about the body. OK? Open up ur eyes. Look more. Think more. I dunno if any of u wanna spend the rest of ur life with a girl with some disgusting attitude juz for sex sake. :p Unless..ur brain happens to be down there...then i would have no comment. *Zipped mouth*

A friend of mine is thin..but not too thin. I consider her to have quite a nice bod minus her boobs and that nice? Nah...not nice bod....but how do i describe it now? Okay..Maybe she is off the right height and her structures are of the right size. There!That's more like it. Anyhow, her face is pretty pimply and her hands are pretty dented outwards. Btw, is dented the right word to use? Nvm. Her face...Mmm...she looks ok..sometimes she looks dull though. Maybe its her complexion. There are few seconds that she looks sweet.That's one point for her.

Another friend of mine. She's super petite. Small everywhere but her boobs are of the right size. An no i do not see her in it is maybe not obvious so i dunno....and no i didn't check her out. It one-look kind of thing. Whats wrong with her? Her face is too oval at some points. That's nothing too wrong coz itz god-made. The big WRONG sign is her teeth. I dunno if she even brush them once a day. Most of the days, her teeth are yellow...few other days, i could see blood.*Eeewww* I dunno how she has a bf..aren't guyz pretty picky?As in they want pretty girls.Good body. Smell nice. Nice hair. Sweet voice. Soft skin. Sweet smile. Where does her teeth fit?Odd....

Another of mine, she has nice long hair. I believe she doesn't brush her teeth too. Odd. I wonder how they could even feel comfortable. Guess their self-esteem is sooo beyond the top of the chart. To top it off, her nails are super long. She sometimes bite them. And of coz...clean off the dirt under one nail with another. So disgusting. These ppl are unbelieveable and it is even more unbelievable how they have a bf. *faint* Either the guyz are blind(blinded by the bodies) or they are juz like these ppl. :p

Letz quite physical stuff. I believe most of the stuff i've mentioned above are not born with these ppl. They made it that way. God, i believe won't create ugly stuff. It is u who doesn't brush ur teeth. It is u who put the scars on ur body. At times holes too. Holes as in weird piercings which make u look uncivilized or in other words barbaric. Sorry but that is how i see it. Things could be accidental but admit it, 70% of the cause is from ourselves just like how i got fat and dark.See what i mean?

Other than the physical side of the world, there are some very successful women who are just not married. Honestly, im scared to say anything related to all these but is pretty scary to be sooooooooooooo successful in career yet to fail to move to the next level in your life which is to have your own family. What is a big house without children running around in it. What's the point of having alot of bucks when there is nothing to buy til the end of our lives coz itz not that we can take the money to afterlife. Life is not just about career and money. U need company, security and of coz love. Your parents and people around u won't be with u forever...u need your own life companion and of coz kids. That's how living things lives their lives. Even plants die. i.e. banana trees would only have fruits once in their continue having more bananas, they have their lil kids to continue. I dunno if u see what i see but that is what i see. There are more to life than juz a high post, money and big house. The essentials would a reliable shelter with roof, water, electricity and gas..clothes and food and of coz enough money for all to continue living. In that case, we can juz settle with a fried egg with plain rice or bread instead of McDonald's or TGIF's meal. Got what i mean? ;)

As for guys, the common flaws i see so far; too skinny that they hardly look they could even have a stable stance, scrawny legs or arms or both, too much gel on their hair or funny hairstyle, smokes, simply annoying and crappy (in terms of actions and verbal),messy facial hair and most of the time...nasal that what u call the hair in da nose?LOL. And last but of coz super gross; spitting in public..EEeeewwwww.
Anyway,guyz...itz disgusting. :p Clue:MAJOR turn-off Girls like me would just disqualify u. :p

Enough grants. I'm posting this now before my pessimism gets a lil out of hand. :p Disgusting ppl out there, thanks for the input. LMAO!

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

I'm not over it...

I alwayz feel that it kills to hear someone getting married, getting birth to their child and etc. I usually feel like slapping their face for being able to move on to the next phase of their life and leave me behind. It is even worse now that i dunno when my time will come or if it will even come. :(
I never really thought about how i'd feel if my friend leaves the world. I'm not even given enough time to get to that thought. Last nite, i bumped into one of my classmate from college online. It has been ages since i last kept in touch with him. Anyhow, he told me an Indian girl from our class is already married (yeahh...another one gettin married..wth). Later on, he told me Jacqueline died already. I was soooo shocked. I asked him where he heard the news. He said one of the chinese guy in our class emailed him to inform. He isn't sure if it is for real. I was so in disbelief that i logged into my Friendster account to dig her account. And it is real. As her profile got loaded. The followings are what i saw. :'(
"May you reach by the god side without pain and sadness.. And leave this world with full of sins.. May god's bless always upon you...Rest in Peace.... "
"rest in peace, god bless u "
"hope u go to another best place...good bye... "

I really do not know how to react or what to think or say. Deep inside, im desperate to know what happened so i messaged 2 girls on her page to ask.
This morning til afternoon, i waited for a new mail to tell me what happened to her. All day before i received the email, i had millions of thoughts running above my head. I was hoping she was just sick til she passed away. I don't wish to see the word "rape","murder","slaughtered","road accident" or even "kidnapped" related to her death.
Finally, around noon..i received an email with her name as the title "jacqueline foo". The girl didn't say much. She just sent one line; "she died of falling from her condo, 9th floor." with 2 links to the news which reported what had happened to my dear friend.
The following are the links given.
There must be other links and newpapers reporting this tragic incident but im to distraught to look up.
Though this is a lil too late..but here are some lil things i remember bout her. I met her back in Feb 03. She was 17 back then. She told all she was from Australia but what confused me was she conversed more fluently in Indonesian than English. She usually hangs out with an Indonesian girl in our class whose name i remember as Vina only. She was also the girl who managed to changed a dull looking malay girl from a local uni into a hip one just coz this malay girl admired her dressing so much.Hihi. Well, her sense of fashion made some other talked behind her backs. As a friend (though i do not know her too well), i usually tell people to stop talking about her. She is just who she is. She has her own mind and stuff. We have no rights to simply say whatever. Plus, she's not on my list of least favourite ppl. We talked just when we're in class and sometimes i'd go lunch with her when i dun keep my nose in some books in the college library. She was also the girl who would always order Shandy when she needs a drink. Honestly, the drink smells good so there was once i asked if it tastes good. She said yes and told me to try. I said no thanks coz it contains alcohol. Knowing she knows very lil bout Islam, i dun blame her when she insisted that i tried coz it only contains 1% alcohol..therefore i won't get drunk.Lol.I refused anyway and she respected that despit the fact that she doesn't really get it. We used to be in the same English class until the lecturer decided to separate the class into 2 groups. There was also once i remember she wanted to get a bikini for Vina for her bday. She barely says anything about her family but from what i remember, her mother was in Indonesia for some bzness-related stuff so she is staying with her dad. From what she had spoken of, her dad sounds like a very strict dad. Apart from her clothes, i know she loves swimming, dye her hair and of coz take pictures of herself. I was only in college for one semester. I then left to enter uni. Didn't really keep in touch with her after that. She was still on my MSN contact list and friendster though.I used to keep her number and email address until some points where she is alwayz changing them.And no i didn't meet her up after i left college. After some time, i only know what's going on with her through her Friendster profile.
This is extremely too late but here's what i've been having in my head or want to say to her as soon as i read the news.
1. Jac, i don't think ur parents can simply cancel out ur visa application; they love u and want u around.Plus, u're not longer underage. I believe u might have to sign something if u wanna get it cancelled unless ur everything is under ur parents. Worst of all, u still have ur Aust PR. U can just to there, get a job and someday be a citizen there. I believe Aust is better than Indonesia for u.
2. Whatever u do, don't ever not come home. Rebel all u want but keep ur parents close to u. They would understand eventually just that u might have to find some other ways to show them what they do not know. U and ur sis are ur parents' children, before u guys, they were not parents. Therefore, they also do not really know how to handle various kids' rebel. Our era and theirs are different. Therefore, there are things they won't understand and trust me, there are things they better not know at all. ;)
3. I didn't know u are on facebook..therefore i did not add u. Anyhow(i know it is wayyyy too late now), i just sent a friend request onto ur Facebook just incase someone opens ur account and saw a pending ensure it happens if it happens, i attached a message to the request.Haiihhh.....
4. I was about to get hold of u and see what u can do with my hair. ( too late)
5. Last and veryyy least :'( ... Jaq, why the raffea..... *sob sob sob* I'd rather hear u getting married or runaway than hearing u leave the world.

Rest in peace Jaq.
Many condolences to your family though none of them has even heard of me before.

What i've learned from Jac's tragic death:
1. Love is definitely blind.
2. We all want freedom especially when the folks use the word "No" or "Don't".
3. We wanna do what we wanna do until there are times we forgot to consider the pros and cons.
4. We will be parents too. Only then we'll pray hard our kids won't treat us like how we treat our parents now.
5. We will only appreciate that lil something when it is no longer around.
6. Mishaps happen all the time.
7. We tend to follow our hearts too much sometimes that we forget we have something better above our shoulders.
8. I'd rather hear my friends getting married and have kids than hear another death of a friend coz i really do not know how to handle it. :(

Thursday, July 31, 2008

"A Step Into A New World" or "An Extension of Ever After"

Some reads. Many doesn't. Some writes. Some reads but do not write. Some other doesn't read and doesn't write. In the era we are in now, it may not be easy to completely not read at all; we read news..blogs..magazines of our interest and many more. However, when it comes to writing, it is no longer related to pen-n-papers. Why do i say so? Well, there are many people who has started blogging and share their thoughts with others. Many of us many no longer write in the so-called old fashion diary and some guys would find it sissy. However, when it comes to blogging, it is as simple as typing what u feel, think or crap about. I'm not sure if i have a reader at all but i enjoy doing this; blogging. I don't call it blogging though. I call it talking and letting things out of my head while jotting it down(incase i wanna recall about a subject matter in the future). Yeah..i'm a just-incase kind of person.

Here's the thing. I've always thought of writing books...or atleast short stories. What i believe is, you may be smart or an expert in a particular area but you are not contributing anything if you do not share it with anyone. Therefore, i think in the end...someday...i will end up writing or be a trainer or lecturer somewhere. When the time comes, i hope my knowledge is sufficient enough to be shared with other people. :)

As of now, lemme jot down what i had in mind.

Idea #1
What? Write a thriller book....vampire and murder kind of thing...
When? 11-12 years old
Influence? Too much of Fear Streets and a lil bit of Goosebumps...LOL ^_^ good ol days.

Idea #2
What? Write a testing book for testers or soon-to-be testers who have just stepped out of uni.
When? Mid 2007 when i was surviving in an R&D company; my first job.
Influence? The challenges i faced and the things i have seen from what i went through.

Idea #3
What? A step into life...where i get to share my experience in certain events in my life;just to share so that people out there would have a lil bit of idea what they might have to face or go through shall they have to go through the similar experience.
When? Few months back...and present ;)
Influence? I just would like to share and would like others to share too...Incase i have to experience something, i won't be feeling so odd.

Idea #4
What? A continuity of kids' favorites....or ....
When? Just few hours ago... :p
Influence? I hate it when happy ending ends with "...happily ever after.." and i also do not feel satisfied when good movie just ends without showing what happens after the happy ending..I WANNA SEE ALL!!! pretty hard to pleased sometimes.Lol

Though i've yet to start writing a single word, i managed to dig out my head and extract these two elements of writing a book out.

1. Editor; gonna pick my English language lover fwen; Intono Zanaryono..sounds Japanese aite?
I had once asked her about being my editor IF i happen to write. Her answer was Yes...and she would charge based on the number of mistakes i make..Haaiihhh....Is that how editors charge the writers?Well,i guess it is better than profit sharing so Intono, sure...u may charge that way and since i'm your so-called childhood fwen..maybe u could gimme a lil bit of discount. ;) Thanks in advance.

2. Illustrator; shall i write a children book..this element is crucial! She is none other than my own cousin. She loves arts and stuff...and i've seen some of her its her. I've asked her and she said "No problem. Anytime."

Wonderful eh?Well, the laast but super crucial element;Publisher. I'll think about that later when i'm extremely serious and have atleast written a lil short story.

Letz see when will i REALLY have some peaceful mind and time to sit down and draft something.In the meantime, itz never wrong for me to dream more about things around me.


Since i overspent on books a few months ago, i vowed not to buy anymore books atleast til end of this year. I still crave for'z what i usually do;
1. Jot down the Title and the Author of the book which caught my eye
2. Add to my VisualBookshelf application on Facebook under the category "Want To Read".
This way, i would have the books listed somewhere incase i forgot all about it when i have the money to spend and no more books to read.

Alternatives : Log into ebook websites.

Free eBook sources :


Enjoy!!!Thank me later...i dun mind a Starbucks JavaChips or Choc Cream Chip as a treat ;)
Or...u can also opt to get me a book ;)

Note : Do inform if there are other good sources. Thanks in advance.

Items waiting for my bucks *sigh*

The following are the items waiting for my bucks :p They have been on my list for quite some time now but Mr. and Mrs Bucks..together with their kids are yet to arrive into my bank account...haaaiiihhhh Most of the time..Either Mr. Bucks or Mrs. Bucks would come...never together or with their kids though. :(

Anyway, here are the items i've had my eyes on ;)

1. iPod radio remote $209
2. Crocs (red) $130
3. Bathroom scale $80*
4. Country-looking frames for my room as deco items $120*
5. Floor lamp $600*
6. StriVectin $400
7. Hair Serum $100*

*Max i would spend on item

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

i Quit!

Was re-organizing stuff on and in my dresser....started coz i've been wanting to do so but haven't got into the right mood at the right time. Anyway, here are the things i wanna quit buying this year! :p

List Of Items Not-2-Buy Til Next Year
1. Books and mags unless i extremely need it and the virtual one is either could not be found or not satisfying.
2. Shower gels....I've lined up the bottles and i have 3 new ones; 1 from Beauti Control and 2 from Body Shop.Will only buy if and only if they are all finished!
3. Hair scrunchie; they are only used once in awhile coz i prefer the hairband.
4. Pens and pencils and highlighters and ...... Barely use them anymore plus i've got plenty. ;)
5. Blank floppy electone uses them to keep the accompaniment for the music...anyhow..i think i have like a dozen blank i better not buy anymore.
6. Necklace,bracelet and earrings which are made of nickel. When can i ever resist buying those cheap ones and out my skin at risk?(I'm allergic to nickel)...With this, i believe i shall just buy either gold or silver. The latter is more affordable and i alwayz have my eyes on Tiffany & Co's stuff and also Perlini's Silver. So far,Tous has yet to be on my list...teddies doens't appear appealing to me that much...simple is nice and easy to care for :)As for gold, i'll stick to white gold as much as i could afford them coz i dun like yellow or rose gold. Other than that, gold has got value over time..IF i ever wanna sell them back...i'd get more $$$.

Will put in more stuff not-to-buy if i could find

Monday, July 28, 2008

The $2 difference between my bro & i

Here'z a $2 story for today.
Here'z also the story of an extreme cheapskate.

There's a cobbler nearby my house. He has been there since we moved into the neighbourhood which is in the year 1998. He has done very good work and i believe some ppl know him too.
As for me, i won't drop by unless there's a desperation.

Everyone knows it is not easy to find a pair of formal-looking shoes...say pumps or courtshoes.
I bought my first pair for this year for $109. Not too expensive and I believe it would last atleast 1 year. However, the tar road proved me wrong. It only lasted for 6months. Plus, it got soaked in a rainy day. What happened to it? I had to dump it and get another pair of shoes when I really wanted to buy some other things.*sighhhh*

My second pair of shoes....As expected;hard-to-find-the-one-i'm-happy-and-comfortable-with.
I ended up with quite a cheap pair but of a better level of brand and quality at ~$60 after 50% discount. ;) It comes with an extra pair of heels. It gave me the impression that the heels won't last long when i first saw it and boy was i right. It last only for 2.5months. Just now, i went down my apartment and hunt for the cobbler to get it fixed. I asked if it would take long. He said no. I waited juz 5mins and tada!Its done.

Guess how much he charged?$1!!!I was like "Whhhoooaaaaa!!!Who in da world would charge that low??!?!?!?!You've got to be kidding man!!" Well anyway,those were in my head.LOL.

I had no small change so i ended up giving money to the shop next to it for a ballpen which cost $2.20...Even a pen costs more..Wth.Unbelievable. I gave him $ feels so bad...ya know...juz $1....super cheapskate.

Here'z when my bro comes in. He knows that cobbler pretty well coz he has chatted with him when he repaired his shoes. There was once when this guy charged him $2, he bargained so the cobbler just charged him $1. My bro is unbelievably extremely CHEAPSKATE!!!Forgodsake..itz just $2...U can't even get a nice ballpen at $2.*ssiiggghhhh*

As for me, i dun mind if he even charges me $3.

The rationale :

1. A new pair of shoes would costs approximately $50 (if i'm lucky enough)
2. I sent my shoes for repair and pay him $3.He gains $3. I save $47.

What more is there to ask for?Forgodsake, nothing is free in this world. I'm super duper thankful they don't charge me for the air that i breathe coz if they do, i won't even last for a day.

Sunday, July 27, 2008

It is worthied :)

Many would say/think it is a waste of money when u spend more than $25 just to get a haircut. As for me, i believe it is worthied as long as u spent it at the rite hair salon. :)

Usually i would spend atleast $40 on my haircut...however,if it is more than $80 then no way.LOL

Why i would say is it worthied.
- Their junior stylist is also good...satisfaction guaranteed.
- Better hair products used (Keratase, Redken, Big Head and etc.)
- Their scissors are sharp...blunt ones could cause split ends!
- They examine your hair as they handle it and give u tips on how you could improve your hair condition or the damage which already exist.
- They know the best shape ;)
- I worry 0% cause i know it will be good :)

Happiness == invaluable :D

Saturday, July 26, 2008


Some may want it big. Some may want it in the outskirt. Some may want it with balconies.

Well...lemme low down what i have in thinkbox(brain) and chestbox(heart).
I'm yet to decide in what kind of property i wanna get;landed or mid-air :p

Definitely or atleast a double storey semi-D or a bungalow with some land plz.

Double Storey Bungalow
-enough rooms for the kids
-1 lil tiny hse for the maid so that i dun have to keep her in my hse.
-1 room for laundrette
-1 study room/library
-1 store room
-1 guest room
-a porch which could fit atleast 3 cars
-big lawn for the kids to run around and for me to have nice flowers

Double Storey Semi-D
-enough rooms for the kids..2kids in 1 room max
-1 room for laundrette
-1 study room
-1 store room
-a porch whoch could fit atleast 2 cars

You might ask what's with the double storey thingy. Well, itz juz coz all my life i've been living in double storey bungalow and semi-ds but currently my family n i are living in 4-rooms apartment..and trust me. When u have more than 3 kids, itz a bad idea to live in an apartment. Go get alteast 2-story terraced house. Lemme list down the reaons.

List of reasons :
1. It is had to study when everywhere u go hear noises...therefore it is not a good surrounding to fill up ur brains with knowledge.U may not need to but ur kid surely does.
2. Itz crazee when everywhere u go u will see someone....haihhhh
3. When u do stuff in ur unit, it could be heard in other units as about p.r.i.v.a.c.y.
4. Everyone sees u come in or go out.
5. When u've got guest, the word p.r.i.v.a.c.y. is definitely out of the webster already.
6. There's hardly anywhere to put ur stuff...esp when u're a girl like me.
7. When u wanna do something with ur hse, u gotta get permission fromt he management first...wth..we are not even asking for their bucks.

Either itz an apartment/condo or a lil landed property.

-atleast 3 rooms;laundry,bedroom and study.
-atleast 2 parking spaces.
-max 4 units per that even possible?LOL

Lil Landed Property
-gated and guarded or atleast has good comes first.
-atleast 3 room.(refer above)
-not too close to the next house...thanks

Here are the things i want for sure.
1. Study room to have a big bookshelf built up from floor to ceiling, 1daybed by the window, 1 nice study table and maybe has flowery wallpaper.
2. Get the bathrooms remodeled to my comfort level. :p
3. Living room in comtemporary style. 1 nice couch(chesterfield maybe?or nice comfy sofa?) , 1 med-size rug, 1 big bean bag, nice sound system, 1 nice coffee table and the rest i'll figure out later....
4. The bedroom is definitely having country style..either english or victorian. :) 1 1-seater couch at the corner of the room. :)

Guess i better stop before i get stuck in my dream nest which is yet to exist.

Friday, July 25, 2008

$$$ Matters

A. Mileage Claim (as of now)

Distance from home to project site : 36KM
Distance from home to main office : 4KM
Therefore mileage claimable : 28KM

1KM --> $1
28KM --> $28

1day --> $28
1mth --> $28 * 20 = $560

Therefore, minimum mileage claim per month = $560

B. OT Meal Allowance

Requirement : Atleast 2hours of OT

1 OT Meal Allowance --> $12
2 days per week with OT --> $24

1 month --> 8days of OT
--> $12 * 8 = $96

C. Total Claims per month

Mileage --> $560
OT Allowance --> $ 96
TOTAL --> $656

D. Total Pay

Basic Pay (after deduction of EPF and etc..) --> $1947.50
Claims --> $ 656.00
TOTAL --> $2603.50

E. Expenses/Debts/Loans & etc

Monthly parking fee at project site --> $ 80
Mom --> $ 200
Electone --> $ 230
Car --> $ 300
Handphone --> $ 100
Petrol --> $ 200
Class --> $ 460
Food --> $ 200
Study loan --> $ 300
Zakat --> $ 22
TOTAL --> $2092


Minimum per month income --> $2500
Minimum fixed expenses --> $2092
Amount of $$$ for author --> $ 408

I'd be lucky if i REALLY get the $408 to usually doesn't go as i calculated...too many essential unexpected expenses :(

E.g. In the month on July

Mom's bday present --> $ 300
Contact and specs --> $ 603
Teammate's farewell --> $ 30
Lil cousin's bday --> $ 30
TOTAL --> $ 963

Expected "Unexpected" expenses for the month of August

Lunch treat --> $ 150
Haircut --> $ 80
Shoes --> $ 150 (REALLY hope i dun have to spend for this..
i plan to get a pair of Crocs, not another pair
of boring working shoes...hope i can juz get
the heels replaced at some cobbler nearby my hse.)

Wednesday, July 23, 2008


No biggie...juz bumped into quite a complete restaurant/ food outlets it is

Thursday, July 17, 2008

Revealed be more precise today 18th July 2008...gawd knows how long has it been since my first post.But i just revealed what i've written to my bf...there u have it honey. It is all written or rather typed here...all the things i may or may not have told you before. Honestly, there's hardly any secrets just some silly thoughts...and dreams...and angers...or sorrows...and of coz dissappointments and frustrations i have along the way.

Bear with me as you read.
Keep your cool. Thanks.

Love u alwayz.

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

I Wish Upon A Star

Last nite, i went to the airport to send my dad off to London. It'z been awhile since i last went to the airport. I miss departuring from the country. I miss getting on the plane. I miss looking for my seat in the plane. I miss the smell in the plane....haihh....When will i ever get on the plane again. That gave me the idea of going to either Melbourne or Sydney next year. The money part, I'll think about it later. LOL!

On my way to the airport, i looked up into the sky just coz itz been soooo long since i actually see what's above the sky. I've been too into my routine activities everyday; Go to work-Lunch-Go home-Chat on the phone-Sleep. When i saw there are a lot of stars in the sky twinkling, i realized itz been sooooooooo very long since i've last seen stars especially that many. I kinda think that i've forgotten they exist. Sad eh? I saw a scorpio :) The rest, i can't tell...not that i remember every zodiac's sign...Hihi

It may seem nothing that i see stars....but itz been forever since i last saw stars...seeing them twinkling... :) Simply tantalizing!

Friday, May 30, 2008

One who is rich is one who has no debt

Priority List shall i have the $$$

1. Settle my electone(juz so dat i can have 230bucks every month to myself;suffer now...enjoy later)

2. My idiotic study loan...they can't stop charging admin fees date...they ate i've paid 1200bucks already and they ate up my nett total i actually paid is juz 1113bucks...WTH!!!!

3. Give them back their car and get a car of my own...and the only 2 eligible drivers are : My dad n i.....possible car?Suzuki Swift :)

4. Survey house...and get buy one....

These are all just dreamsssss but a dream is a motivation itz good to dream and plan :)

Monday, May 26, 2008

It is not boring; it is nicccceeeeeeee :)

I would like the Malaysians to love reading..especially the youths....guess itz pretty hard to get it done...but not impossible i believe :D
We just need to get them to read based on their genre...yes..humans has got genre
As for genres are Chic-Lit,Self-Help and Computer (Technical).

I dunno if i can ever get my brothers to love reading.I dunno if i can ever ditch the idiot box and RPG thingy...I dunno how can i tell people reading is not boring.

I know for sure that i got my bf to read...even if itz juz bzness-related stuff...those are still books and the reading word is there....and i managed to get him to love spending time in the bookstore i believe.

Here at work,i kinda get a colleague of mine to read.He'z into deep non-fiction stuff....guess he'z a very critical guy...i prefer light stuff after work.This morning,another colleague of mine, asked me what kind of books i read...and she said she had juz finished reading a chinese book.Wow!I didn't tell them to read...they juz hear me read :) Fantastic.I dun have to pester people...

Well.Letz hope i can get more people to read after this post :)

Saturday, May 24, 2008

Shopaholic on the lease A.L.O.N.E.


Who says i won't shop much if i'm alone? Soooo wrong :p

I wasn't supposed to be alone in the first place. My friend couldn't make it to the city...
Thank god i live so very nearby the heart of the city. LOL

Initial mission :
1. Hunt a bday present for a colleague (his 23rd bday is next week)
2. Go to the Bookfest and buy some books.
3. Catch "What Happens In Vegas" at TGV.

I ended doing the following :
1. Bought 2 clothes; 1 formal-ruffley blouse and 1 t-shirt with a gold butterfly there such word as ruffley anyway?Lol Walked over to the Toys section in iSetan...and found nothing.

2. Queued up at TGV to get the ticket to watch "What Happens In Vegas". Halfway in the line, the screen displated that the cinema is already full :( so i left the line.

3. Went to a gift shop..saw a nice bookmark..didn't buy though.

4. Was super hungry to went to a Japanese Restaurant...first time there...not a book while waiting...was alone..what do u expect?

5. Went to a shop named Room to see that they have for a guy's room...hardly find anything.

6. Went to Kinokuniya bookstore..bought 2 "The Last Lecture" books (1 for myself and 1 as the present) and Java Swing...i should have been spring...i bought the wrong book...damnit

7. Went back to the gift shop and bought the bookmark so that the guy doens't have to dogear his books or sis book's anymore.

8. Walked all the way down to the Concourse floor...walked through the pedestrian tunnel to the convention center to get to the Bookfest...finally...

9. Pretty lost there....but i made it through...first walked through all the mandarin books...damn i can't read mandarin....then got to the cd n IT sections...bought a 4GB thumbdrive and some blank CDs and a bluetooth USB adapter....were all cheap....and 2 music cds i dun even understand Korean and one I thought i was done when i already paid....i ended up at the English books section....bought some books there....haih...when will i ever stop....
By this hands were fully loaded with stuff already and i can't wait to leave the place and go home....but i was super thirsty and i haven't bought the guy's bday i walked as fast as i could back to the mall...bought a card...then got myself an Iced Lemon Tea....then only i head back to my car...

Now, my legs are be exact...itz my feet. Hihi

idunnohowmanyhundredbucksivespenttoday :'(

I must first stop buying books and clothes!!!!Minus Jeans....hahaha

The next and last book i will buy this coming 2 or 3 months is :
Remember Me by Sophie Kinsella (The hardcover one!!!!) No one is getting this for i'll just it get myself! Maybe i shall get it next weekend when i go to the Golden Triangle again...hihi OMG....I'm already planning for next Saturday???WTH??!!!!!?!?!?!

I killed someone today...My dreams were not juz dreams...They gimme signs

I woke up from a bad dream youngest bro and i was playing with a his friend. We played some sort of a chasing game...i chased the kid and he ended up on an abandoned undermaintainence roller-coaster...when i saw the "Under Maintenance" signage...i was too late to save the boy...he ran on the rail and one of the railing fell...and he fell onto the ground which was few storeys below us.I saw the boy's father and accompanied them to the cemetery to burry the boy. Out of nowhere, my dad appeared telling there's a skeleton in the ground (the spot where the boy was about to be burried)....after some time digging...Yes...we indeed discovered a skeleton. One of the hands was still pretty fresh though. Like as if it was just dead few hours ago. It was very pale. We held the hand and though "Who's hand is this?". My dad said he wants to take it home. I was very scared already. My mom said the hand looked a lil like my dad's. That made him wanna take it home even more. I couldn't say anything. I just want the boy's body to be cremated as soon as possible. As soon as it was cremated, the world was already very dark. I went to the mall where i originally parked my car...then i bumped into a friend...we talked...then i guess i eventually went home...The moment i opened my eyes, it was 6am.
I wonder when was the last time my brain actually stopped working and rest at night. I have dreams every nite. Its juzt whether it is significant to remember or not. Most of the time, they were juz some general kind of things that i don't even wanna they juz went away....

Another part of my dream last nite was....
I went to someone's house which was also a hair saloon..i went there to trim my hair. In my dream, i went there because they were all female and i feel comfortable with them (i dunno them in real-life though). The first woman started trimming my hair...then she left and told me to wait as she wants to watch the idiot box or answer a call. I waited for a very long time.Veeerrrryyyyy felt like hours. I made a face..then a girl saw me and said sorry; the other lady forgot she cut my hair..WTH?!Anyhow, the girl continued to trim my hair and it turned out juz so-so.
Nothing significant here but i just remember the dream.LOL...Well 3 things to highlight here though; 1. I hate the idiotic box. 2. I hate it when ppl put me on hold just so that they can answer their calls and later forget they were talking to me. 3. I hate waiting!!!!!

Here comes the part that relates to the title above (yeah....i love to tell things from the very extreme beginning..i wonder how my significant other can stand

I left home around 945am this morning to withdraw my money from the ATM. Then i headed to the Golden Triangle. On my way there, i was thinking about my dream...and how will my day be today. Out of nowhere, a brown orangey cat ran to cross the road...right in front of my was too late for me to stop my i ran into it...or rather him....or hit the front of my car very hard...when i looked into my side mirror, i saw the cat on the road and something(looks like a piece of board..didn't know what it was) flew.....the cat was sooo in pain....i screamed when i ran into it....i swear i could feel the bones i ran onto... :'( I can't believe i did that...and of all creature...i killed the kind of creature i love the most :'( i was shaky for awhile...called a friend just to talk it out...when i reached my destination and parked my car, i check if anything went wrong with my car or if there's anything stuck in front of my car...that's when i discovered my car plate number was missing....So that was the thing which flew when i hit the cat. Any witness? Well,there was a mid-age man on the side of the road in front of the Indonesian Embassy when i ran into the cat. He looked at me...and he looked fierce. I believe he heard the cat screaming :'( OMG.........................Plz forgive me..............Mr./Miss Cat....... Plz forgive me.....I didn't didn't see u..... :'( I REALLY didn't.........Hope u dun have ur family members waiting for u to return....Gosh............ :'(

After i'm done with my stuff in the Golden Triangle, i headed back to my housing neighbourhood and look for a car workshop to get the car plate replaced. Thought of just replacing the one which broke but it would make the one at the back of my car looks very old and i changed both...and it cost me 30 bucks. Being a shopaholic, i didn't just pay for the plate numbers...i bought a pair of window shades for my car...thought i could put in on the driver's ended up being in the shape of the windows for the windows at the back for passengers...WTH...i put it on that when i drive ppl arond (whenever is that), they will be shaded.Haih....Well, it was 10 bucks.

Saturday, May 17, 2008

Loneliness Kills


L.o.n.e.l.i.n.e.s.s. kills...
How can i erase the word from my database?
Somebody plz help me......Guess this is quite the phase where my smiles and laughter could not hide how i feel inside :

So in need for someone by my side.....i'm such a kitten....... :

This is also a phase where my work can't help to distract me from feeling the loneliness :

So in need for someone to be close to in need for security and comfort...and love...and.....yeah...i could go on and on...and still feeling the same and hold back my i guess i should juz jet off now...hope i will be feeling better in my next post to myself. :

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Things better not spoken

There are things which are better kept to our hearts sometimes...esp in a relationship.
I've learnt to be patient. I've learnt to compromise. I've learnt to put my anger aside.
And the list goes on.....yet there are still more things to improve.
No doubt things can make u doubt whether or not your relationship would work...therefore,faith and determination are the keywords....i guess atleast 2 of the keywords.

Let me get straight to the point and let it out. Since it is juz 9:12am in the morning when i start cracking lines here.

I hate the fact that his biological clock is sooooo messed up.
He is almost nocturnal.Urgh...never knew this could be used on homo sapiens..but i juz used it...worse...i used it on someone i wanna have my future with.How ironic.Anyhow....i'm already working now. My work is pretty demanding at times. It is very nice that ppl around me understand that esp my family. In a relationship....communication is crucial. My biological clock is fine. I sleep at nite...i wake up and go to work in the morning. I don't doubt that there are times my work is eating up my life but i try my very best to pull it back to me. I.e. i make sure i read atleast one chapter in my storybook everyday....and sing to the songs i love and of coz listen to the radio....and yeah...facebook'ing.See!I have life!

Now, back to HIM.
1. He doesn't do his work til itz like 2 hours b4 submission...sometimes the nite b4 the deadline.
2. He hardly wakes up b4 the time he gets pretty done with 12 hours of my day.
3. He doesn't eat properly and eats fastfood rather than cook crap on his own.
4. He's glued to the idiot box...urgh.
5. Hardly focused on his studies....his uni sux too...they juz suck $$$....this is definitely a priority issue
6. If i manage to leave the office early...he wants to go out with his friends and come back like 9...or 10 pm....

Last nite, he went out right after i finished packing up my stuff to go home. When i reached home, i called to ask when will he be back..he said around 9...When he got home, he told me a friend of his is coming over to buy air tickets coz this idiotic guy doens't have credit card..he said it won't take long...however,he only called when it was almost 11pm...hello?i've been up since morning and i've been working not sitting down and do nothing at the end,when he called me, i was already asleep...therefore,no communication.Full stop.

Mister...please get ur stuff done..which is to get a degree and come back to kl. Forget bout earning soooo much money from stock exchange and forex and some fancy bzness ideas of urs as gettin a degree is ur number one.Quit paying for astro and stop watching the idiot would make u an idiot after sometime.It first makes u a slave...then make u an idiot. Forget bout the moronic LAN games...once in awhile it is fine..but if it steals ur study time and mood away from u.Ditch it. Stop copying other ppls' hw and tests. U have better brains. Use it! Last but not least, stop dreaming about a new car. If u wanna get married and serious about it,save the $$$.OK?We can worry about ur car later.It is me who needs a new one.Need...not want....OK?

See!These kind of things are better kept inside....if i were to talk this way,it will definitely ruin my relationship. All i do is keep one eye closed and take a very deep breath. Who says i dunno how to live my life?I do :) I really do...though compromising is pretty tough....i still do :)

Sunday, May 4, 2008

Personality Report courtesy of

Personality Type Report

Your Personality Preferences

You appear to be an equal mix of both extrovert and introvert. This may cause you some conflict at times. On the other hand, the balance of the two may work just fine for you. There is certainly nothing wrong with having a fair share of both types if you are happy. Below you will find descriptions of both types.

You are social and outgoing. You are most comfortable when with other people and experiencing the world first hand. Interaction with others and first hand experiences energize you. It is not unlike you to start conversations with strangers. You have a preference for the outer world: people, activities, and things. Other people provide you with a mirror, sounding board to help you develop ideas and plans. Being alone may sap your energies. Your concept of the world is derived from experiencing it firsthand and then drawing conclusions.

While you may not be anti-social, you do need (and deserve) your private time and space to retreat from the world. Unlike extroverts, you need to develop a concept of the world or some aspect of it before experiencing it. Too much socializing may sap your energies. Your energies are derived from exploring the inner world of ideas, impressions and pure thought.

You appear to be an equal mix of both sensory and intuitive types. This may cause you some conflict at times. On the other hand the balance of the two may work just fine for you. There is certainly nothing wrong with having a fair share of both types if you are happy. Below you will find descriptions of both types. SENSORY You usually gather information with your senses: what you can see, hear, taste, touch and smell in the physical world. The facts gathered from the sensory data you process are the building blocks of your model of our world. You concentrate your energies on what actually exists and do not ponder what might exist too much. You are usually practical and rely on your common sense to guide you through the world. You see things as they are and have little or no need to search for underlying meanings.

While you do process information through your senses you add a twist to your processing by relying on intuition and serendipity. You look for undercurrents of meaning and abstractions in what you experience physically. You do not just see things just as they are, but as what they could be. While you may rely on common sense at times, you trust inspiration far more.

You appear to be an equal mix of both judging and perceiving types. This may cause you some conflict at times. On the other hand the balance of the two may work just fine for you. There is certainly nothing wrong with having a fair share of both types if you are happy. Below you will find descriptions of both types. JUDGING You like decisions to be made as soon as possible. You are not comfortable with loose ends and like to see conflicts resolved as soon as possible. You have a preference for a well-structured, orderly lifestyle with few surprises. It may not be all that important who makes the decisions that gets things done as long things do get done. You take commitments very seriously.PERCEIVINGYou like to have as much information as possible before making a decision. Putting off a final decision until the last moment does not make you uncomfortable. Indeed once a decision is made, a course plotted, you may feel a bit uneasy, because you feel bound to a certain course of action. You would much prefer to wait and see what happens. You enjoy the opportunity to improvise. Commitments are not etched in stone to you, and are changeable.

You appear to be an equal mix of both thinking and feeling types. This may cause you some conflict at times. On the other hand the balance of the two may work just fine for you. There is certainly nothing wrong with having a fair share of both types if you are happy. Below you will find descriptions of both types.

You make decisions subjectively based upon your values and what is important to you. How people will be affected by your decisions is important to you. You are likely to make decisions based upon what you feel is acceptable and agreeable rather than what is logical. Your truths are founded in your values and those of the society you live in. It is important to remember that we are discussing how you evaluate data and make decisions, and that you rely on your feelings to do so in no way implies you are overly emotional.

You evaluate data and reach conclusions by using your ability to apply logical, objective analysis to the information before you. Your thinking process values consistency and fairness over the affect your decisions will have on others. You compare courses of action logically and make your choices based upon what consequences you see them as having. If there is something wrong with a plan, you are the one to ferret it out. It is important to remember that this does not mean you are cold and unfeeling, but that your thinking process is analytical.

Your Personality Type
Because your personality preferences were so evenly matched, it is not possible for this assessment to derive a specific personality type for you. This in no way implies there is anything wrong with you! It simply means that your preferences are far too balanced for a short assessment like this to assign a specific personality type for you.

Your personality preferences suggest you may be one of two personality types, so both these types are listed below.

You are outgoing, energetic and reliable. You like taking the role of the leader. Considering your well-developed organizational skills and abilities to implement successful policies and procedures, the leader role is perfect for you. You can focus your energies on solving problems without getting drained. You are assertive, outspoken, do not shy from hard work, goal oriented, consistent, practical and logical.In relationships, you like to take on the role as advisor/director and will happily assume important responsibilities. You will keep your commitments at almost any costs. You are fun to be around--if all the work is done. You seek active pursuits with your family and friends. You are very comfortable with the role of provider. You may have difficulty understanding your emotions or those of others. You may feel your way is the best way, and force it on those around you. You can be impatient with others and have a closed ear to their ideas and needs. .

Famous People of Your Type:
James Monroe, Andrew Jackson, William Henry Harrison, Franklin Pierce, Grover Cleveland, Harry S. Truman, Lyndon B. Johnson, Carrie Nation, Elliot Ness, John D. Rockefeller, Bette Davis, Barbara Stanwyck, Rev. Billy Graham. .Occupations Suited to Your Type Include:Administrator, Attorney, Information Manager, electrician, Dentist, Doctor, Teacher, Bank Officer, Contractor, Manager, Law Officer, Military Officer, Stockbroker, and Supervisor.

You make a very confident leader and enjoy being in charge. You are ambitious and do not hesitate to make decisions. You are a master at solving complex problems, and relish intellectual interaction. Your talent for innovation is bolstered by your ability to think analytically and logically. You value your independence and are a self-starter. Regardless of the task, your goal remains the same: to be the best there can be. Where others see obstacles, you see challenges.In relationships you are sincere and plain-spoken. You need a life of gusto and an upbeat tempo. While very serious about your work, you do have a fun loving side that comes out often. You nurture those you care for by encouraging them towards goals you feel will improve their life and status. You see relationships as opportunities to learn. You may be a bit overbearing at times. Social status is important to you. You often hide the soft side of you by displaying a tough exterior to the world.

Famous People of Your Type:
Franklin D. Roosevelt, Richard M. Nixon, Benny Goodman, General Norman Schwarzkopf, Harrison Ford, Steve Martin, Whoopi Goldberg, Sigourney Weaver, Margaret Thatcher, Al Gore, Candace Bergen, Dave Letterman, Jim Carrey .

Occupations Suited to Your Type Include:
Administrator, banker, curriculum designer, economist, engineer, planner, information technology manager, attorney, manager, doctor, psychologist, researcher, scientist, stockbroker, and systems analyst.

Note : This is the closest ever i guess...hihi

Saturday, May 3, 2008

Extremely Hectic

Itz been awhile since i last posted a new post.
Well,lots had happened...lots of $$ had been spent...and of coz lotsa time has been spent in the office...working.They still dare to say they want their employees to have work and life balance *Sighhh*

Now, i'm trying my very best to have the balance. There's simply more to life than just work.Right?Anyhow, since i started working in this company, i made a vow that i will not bring home my in continue doing my work after i get home from work.Craziness.
I have spent like half of my day in the office working already...if i were to bring home my work and get it done at home....i only have like what...3 or 4 hours to myself???No way!So not happening.

I started picking up books to read and try my very best to read atleast a page per day. My vocab is soooo getting limited and i dun think i wanna say anything about my sentence construction. I'm thankful that i can still form decent sentences to write my thoughts here.Hahaha

U might wanna know what happened to the new electone. Well, i love it. The first song i played on it was "I Don't Wanna Miss A Thing" by Aerosmith..almost cried....juz cause it took me soooo long to have a proper electone and this time i spent my own money on it. Minus this month, i still have 21 more months to settle the installments. It is worthied. I now have something else i can do besides juz work stuff. Been seeing my friends since the 1st week of April so im hardly at home over the weekends.HArdly have time to get anything in my room organized.*Ashamed*
The last time i played a song on the electone was maybe 2 or 3 weeks ago.

My still the test data thingy. This time it is worse coz i have to create test data to be sent to 3rd parties like DiGi, Celcom and UMobile for them to their Maxis data at their side. Not-so ez-pz. Had to do some clean ups a number of times. In the end, i ended up creating the test data in 1-by-1.Tediosity is a newly added word in my vocab. Thanks to the test data.Anyhow, i hope to get to roll-off this project in the end of this month. When they first assigned me to this project, my roll-off date was 1st of June. After some time, they extended it to 1st Oct.*Sighhh* Now, it is back to 1st June. However, though they said the date is already confirmed, my date still says 1st Oct. Hope they would update soon. :

Virtual vs Physical

How do i go about with this?

Shall i start writing in my diary and stick writing in it coz itz so accessible anytime or shall i keep posting things here according to my mood needs?Is there such thing?Hihi

Well, i guess i'll juz use both....depends on my mood. Kao tim. :)

Sunday, March 9, 2008



So can't wait for my EL-500 to come!!!!
Well, at the same time i'm pretty sad to let go my has been quite a company after all these years...though i've not really played it when i was doing my degree.Hihi

EL-500 was at a good price and the price they offered for my EL-25 was also pretty good so i just went for it.So thankful i had my dad with me;he reduced 300 bucks more!!!Haih...when will i get such negotiation skills?!?!?!?!?!?!

Date to look forward to : 15th March 2008!!!!!

To do before EL-500 arrive :
1. Take pics of EL-25
2. Have my pics taken while i play EL-25
3. Play EL-25 til i feel satisfied
4. Dust EL-25 :)

Gossh!!!!So can't wait!!!! :D

Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Damnit!!!!! LoveStory

LoveStory...sounds so times crappy too.

You can hardly tell which is wrong and which is rite in love unless you can see your future....
Long distance relationships rarely work but i have faith in mine coz mine has got quite a solid foundation before he had to go.

Most people would say it would make your heart grow ponder.In my opinion, it makes you fight even more.LOL!We tend to fight not cause we don't miss each other but we fight cause we miss each other too much but there's nothing we can do about it. :

My mood was sooo off last nite.He finally got his internet connection installed so he could now see me online and he'z been wanting to have vid calls with me so i believe has has first been waiting for his internet connection.Then he waited for me to get home.Right after im done with my mood got worst.Thanks to my dad(Refer prev. post).

I got to my room.Turned on the electone and started playing but nothing sounds and feels right so i called him up....he took soooo long to pick up.Itz not an issue itz juz that i have he'z-stuck-with-some-games-on-his-pc thought in my head.Yeah...assumption..assumption..assumption....sowie.It turned out that he was spreading some peanut butter on his bread...forgodsake,wat'z wrong with putting the bread down and pick up???Rite?I alreayd drop whatever i'm doing when i hear him calling..why can't he do the same?Rite?Urgghhhhh....forgodsake itz juz a bread!

He picked up the phone and told me he would call me later....i can't stand talking to him with his mouthful on the phone cause i can't make out what he's saying and my mood is crazee.Usually he would ca;; me rite after he'z done with whatever he is doing but apparently last nite...he got stuck somewhere i guess...else why would he take forever rite?Then he said he wants to vid call so i hungup...get my webcam and mic connected.Called him up.His messenger hit some error and he got disconnected.That surely added fuel.I called to ask why he said "Forget it.I'm not in the mood.I dunno why you have to alwayz ruin my mood.Why do u like to fight so much?"

Trust me.I don't wish to fight.Just that sometimes he adds spice to my temper.And so everything is dumped on him in the end.Then he would complain why do i dump things on him.Can't help it honey.U're suppose to help me calm down not add things up.And when i'm super crazee u could atleast help me get to the sane side rite?You need to fight fire with water not fire with fire.HE even dare to say "This is what i meant we can't get along".WTF?!?!?!?!The question now u wanna work on it or not....not whether u can get along or not.Damnit!!!!!

A friend of mine who got back from Africa got married after few months being with her husband(her bf back then)....she chatted a lil with me yesterday and she sounded oh-so-happy....i dunno if i'll ever be bf seems to take forever.This is our 7th year together...Damnit!!!!If you don't take actions on ur won't happen.Planning is a very important thing....90% of the people i know do not know this and i hate it coz they will end up implementing the word Adhoc and it kills me.

Honey, can't u be water once in awhile?..........

Damnit!!! @home

I dunno why but somehow now, i've gotten back to my electone and i'm looking forward to sell off my very old model of electone (EL-25)and get a used EL-500.The salesperson can't take more than RM1.7k for my electone and for me to get the model i wanna buy, i will need to pay RM250 every month for 2 years...not that long rite?But i dunno where i'll be within that 2years....So now i'm really thinking...and i have to decide within 2weeks....*sighhhhhhh*

Sometimes i wish i could be far away from home.No doubt i will miss them.Miss the homecook food and of coz miss my room. :( But things at home can be very tensed.I really wish i could cry all of this out...but surprisingly i can't. :(

When i got home last nite, it was already about 8:30pm. I ate my dinner.Then when i saw my 17-year-old bro. I asked him if he has gotten his bicycly fixed. Number one, my dad will use my car to send him to school which will cause my car's petrol(i'm not rich to keep filling in the petrol) and of coz the risk of not getting a parking spot near my block.*sigh*
Secondly, he will have to walk home everyday which oddly he doesn't mind these few weeks...very odd...i doublt he walks...he must have someone sent him home.Some rich friend's sis or mother or driver...i dunno.
When by bro said no, i asked him why not, he replied "No, i don't have time". I was like..."No time??What time do u get home btw?" He said 4 or 5pm everyday.IS that even late?Is that what u call 'no time'?Itz now the 'whether u-want-it-or-not question.Then there came my dad's voice; "Enough...why do u have to create such situation?It has nothing to do with you" ...well nothing to do with me but definitely something to do woth my money!!!!I juz replied "He would have to walk home everyday if he doesn't get it fixed." My dad replied "It is alrite.Up to him.Stop have reminded him once and that is enough already.Stop this." My last reply was "'s nothing just that u can be on your own feet why bother be one someone else's shoulders and depend on them to carry u?" Then my dad went ballistic; "What is wrong with you???!?!What is your problem?Why do you like this kind of situation so much?This has nothing to do with you.Why is it such an issue?Can't u keep keep quiet?I really don't get you.What is wrong with you?Stop this." As expected, i shut up but to hear him talk like that to me, i dun feel good being home anymore. :'( And that somehow brought back the scene when i was involved in an accident with the police bike with his companies' rented car; "I have done the stupidest mistake in my life...Why did u drive this car?..What am i going to answer to the management?What will happen to my record at work?" Problem with me is, i live in the past sometimes...well, maybe most of the times just becoz I REMEMBER.After all the commotion, i cleared up the dishes and put them on the rack and head to my room.Til now i feel i dun wanna be here. :(

:'( Lemme just cry in my heart.

Damnit!!!! @work

Wassup with everyone?Can the please stop messing with me?
To start with, why in da world does the motorcyclists be in the middle of the lane when they can hardly go faster than a car????Why must they be in the middle when we wana change lanes coz the car in front of us is too slow or the car behind us is going too fast???Damnit!!!

At work, i feel super demotivated already; i'm dumped to create inventories and accounts and inventories again...and accounts again....*sighhhhhhh* itz not so easy to create coz sometimes the environment can have sooo many issues at the same time and sometimes the users request for ridiculous stuff that i can't bulk create using the bulk create program so there are some i have to create one by one.Damnit!As for the first request, i'm not even 50% done up to this moment i'm typing this. Suddenly, there'z another request for phone numbers btu in the end the request is kept onhold coz they themselves can't decide the right prefix for the numbers they wanna use.WTH!?!?!?Next came another request and the user want it within 1 or 2 days, pretty adhoc rite?They wanna it to be in a diff server...some stuff juz couldn't be done from the til now i still have some trouble to get it done; have to disable some table references but i can't do it so i would require someone else's help but that someone maybe sees it as something not-so important or that someone is just to bz to look at my stuff.Damnit!!!!Towards the end of yesterday, came in another request...not many but a lil bit troublesome coz she wants many diff accounts under different type and packages and yea....diff types of penalties..WTH?!?!?!?Why can't they create????I can provide the numbers and SIMs no prob....Damnit!!!!
While others are getting super familiar with the system, i create stuff like a factory..can't say im not important but my tasks are pretty tedious and of cz repetitive...see the word "BORING"???LOL!A few is given the chance to look into automation tools...why them?Im the one who was a test engineer b4 this.... : and yea..then again i have a handful of tasks and i dunno if anyone wanna gimme a i'm wondering if they purposely do this to tell me i'm not capable in the end of the day....possible rite?*told ya i'm pessimist*

Now, my career.Where do i go from here?My current capability is Java but i hardly touch Java after i graduated...i wanna do SAP but til now, i still haven't complete the SAP Overview training..*haihhh* If the really can't get me into SAP, I'm gonna do my very best to get myself to be Oracle Associate DBA!!!I tell u i will if you don't gimme what i want!Could be a lot of work and time but i'm willing to do it to be different!!!!And of coz to show them i can be valueable without their help.Who are they to decide in the first place???Damnit!!!!

My current roll-off date is 1st June... most people will be gone by then...but now i'm wondering if they wanna keep me that long since i know nothing much about how to the system does it stuff....I dun mind rolling-off earlier..but where will they dump me next?I have no sense of direction.I dun like to park at funny places.I still wanna be able to claim adequate mileage.


Friday, February 29, 2008

Catching Up!

Guess what?
I actually reached the office at 715am today...just to finish some stuff.
Well,not actually finish as in 100% finish....juz 50% of the list of items given to me.
All this is due to the fact that the users are juz plainly users...everything must be perfectly set up for them therefore they dun even have to create things from scratch...

I'm only at 32% so....18% more to go to reach 50%.Dat'z the figure the leader gave me so i better dig out all the seconds i've got to meet the goal...well, i aim to give 53% ...see how.

Tonite..i wanna get to my electone and play it like mad...and of coz practice some pronouciation stuff :) :) :)

Mmm...what am i doing here????LOL *jet off*

Thursday, February 28, 2008

IT Confusion State

Here I am...confused (again....)
Why am I alwayz in confusion? Well, on top of the list is alwayz the part of me which wants to know all and be good in all..while being good at hardly anything right now. *sighhhh*

So..what'z the confusion about this time? Keyword : IT, job, SAP, Java and Oracle.

Main aim :
1. Project Manager
2. DBA @ PRo-programmer :p
3. Trainer (this might be it when i'm down with many kids and a husband..planning is good rite?)

List of interest (in whatever order)
Interest 1 : SAP
Reason : HUGE demand, anywhere in the world....going places...more towards
customization rather than building i guess.It also looks like a complete system..
well it should be rite?
Concern : How long will it last being strong in the market?

Interest 2 : Oracle
Reason : Pretty good demand..i'v spent my dad's RM1.5k on the training but did not take
the certification exam...didn't really get what the instructor was taking about and
my stuff did not work they did the hands-on thingy so i dunno what i know :(
Concern : I will have to dig out time to read both volumnes of the books...DBA carries pretty
HUGE data data info info info...

Interest 3 : Java
Reason : Many companies moving towards freeware thingy..and it could also work on SAP
thingy now. Looks interesting...well,i admit it IS interesting as long as i know what
thing to use and how to implement it. LOL.
Concern : Needs lotsa lotsa hands-on and patient people to guide me and get me up and

Redken - Scalp Relief

For those who wants clear scalp, i recommend Redken - Scalp Relief. Don't get it wrong. It is Redken new shampoo for anti-dandruff and the bottle is white.
Up to today, i've been using it for about 2 week plus and it is working great :) Thank god...

Where to buy : Shins and some other hair salons
Price : ~RM43

Trust me. I've tried lotsa shampoos..from the ones in the supermarket shelves to the ones in the salon shelves...hahaha

List of anti-dandruff shampoos i've tried :

1. Pantene
2. Head & Shoulders
3. Sunsilk ( never ever use this; hair falls like crazeeeeeee )
3. Redken ( prev anti-dandruff shampoo; black bottle )
4. Lakme ( it would make ur scalp drier...atleast mine... )

Well, that'z all for shampoo story. :)

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Musical Mood ~~~Tralalalala

Dunno what has got into me...suddenly i'm super into music...yea...again..LOL
My electone books are back in my room..the electone bench is back to where the electone is instead of the ironing board or the dresser.

Found the acapella group in KL named six2eight..thought of joining..emailed the manager and he siad they look for people from time to time...question now is; would my parents approve?Will i have all the time in the world to do everything?Will i fit in?The manager didn't mention anything about having a good voice...he only mentioned "......and a voice that can blend. An attitude that is not afraid of performing in front of audiences and able to deliver a song are helpful, though these can be developed." ;)

Rite now...since last fri i've been having Marie Digby's songs in my ears at work and at home.LOL..Now i have the playlist on my blog...hihihi

Sunday, February 24, 2008

Marié Digby

Marié Digby...never heard of her b4...yea i'm so outdated.
Well,i bumped into her clips on youtube when i was youtubing on some BSB live concerts.Have to admit that they are good :)
Marié Digby....her voice caught my attention and keep me wanting to listen to more.
Then i discovered her myspace...followed by her facebook. :)
Thought of getting her album...couldn't get it anywhere; it will only be out on the 8th of April this year....duhhhhhhh LOL
Well,you might ask why don't i just pre-order...1st,it will be in US dollars..which is like 4 times Malaysian currency...2ndly they might have more songs like...some bonus tracks over the i sometimes wait til the time comes to buy.LOL

For the time being,I'll keep hitting this site; to keep on listening to her songs.Wish i could play my electone like how she plays her guitar...and of coz i wish i could reach the notes like she could.Nvm...i'll keep practicing.Hihi

Marié Digby on facebook :

The National Library

Now and Then
First time i've been in the National Library was when i was about 8 years old.
Was taken there by my dad. He had to do some research on something i guess.
He left me at the childrens' library...gawd knows for how many hours.
The books there were pretty old back then.Hardly found anything i'm interested in.LOL.
And yeah..i was all alone. No siblings with cousins and no friends. :(

2nd time i was there...i was 15 years old; had to get my Geography or History researh paper done. Was with a few friends. I'm sure my bestfriend Al is one of them.Stuff there were of coz old....LOL And there were alot of teenagers and people in their 20's.Probably some university students.

Many more times.....can't remember...but i'm sure itz for my research paper (again...).
And yeah..i only remember being there with my bestfriend Al.The very last time i went with her was when i was 17.Think i was studying for my SPM (Malaysian O Level).Was with Al and her sis.We "rented" the was meant for 2 only so her sis didn't get to come in.After around 30mins of checking into the cube..we secretly drag her sis with us.LOL...and we brought in food.Dunno why we did that....hahaha

I've only been there with my bf once....can't remember why we went here....but i had to wait for him to line up and register and renew my membership.The line at the library was forever long back then so whoever who is not a member and plans to go to the library,they'll go very early in the morning..*sigh*

My very recent visit is yesterday (23rd Feb 2008) just cause my bro wants to go so very was already 230pm when we left home and i prayed hard the line won't be long.I hate waiting!!!Anyway, the admin changed already!!Thank god.Everything is more organized now.they have a counter where you can enquire about stuff and take the number for you to queue and about 4 counters to handle registration *phew*
I renewed my membership and my bro got himself registered.Each costs RM1 each.

Since he is only 11 years old...we have to go to the childrens' looks more like a nursery to me...and at times it looks like a playground..not that it only looks that also sounds that come no one ensures the kids behave like how they have to behave in a library???????I sat at one corner..opened my Unix book and turned on my iPod(Thank god 4 d iPod).what i observed was...girls would sit at a table and read some story books or get their homeworks done while the boys run around the library and make lotsa noise.The range of age of girls who made noise was between 3 to 6 years old.Boys???99% with the age between 4 to 11 years old....funny.The maturity level is very obvious and the difference is pretty big.

Some parents just leave their children there.Some stayed with their children.I see it as a great thing that the parents encourage their children to read; Malaysians hardly read!!!!However, with children missing almost one every month..i believe it is best if the parents could keep an eye on their children all the time especially if their children are girls;the culprit seems to aim girls... :(

Overall view
The admin has definitely improved.
The library is more or less like how i remembered it.
The childrens' library has better collection. The facilities were upgraded too.
I hope they would provide free wi-fi soon; Starbucks could..why can't the National Library,rite?


My 23rd February

Thought the day started well...boy was i wrong :(

Ran some errands

Sang few songs on the karaoke system.

Picked up my youngest bro from his tuition class.
Took my youngest bro to the National Library just cause he wanted to go so much; had to keep my eyes wide open....yeah i have no sense of direction...thank god i reached the library without getting lost. *phew*
Read some chapters of SAMS Teach Yourself Unix in 10 minutes.
Discovered someone ran into the side of my car (passenger side)...*sighhhh*
That practically ruinned my day :(
It won't cost much to get it fixed..juz that the door is a lil it dented so it needs to be knocked from the inside...gawd knows when will i get it done.I dunno which idiotic doesn't know how to drive a car..
Well,if you can't handle a big car, get small car.
If you can't handle a small car, get yourself a motorbike.
If you can't handle anything...just use public transportation.
Nuff said!

A Brand New Beginning

Letz see what'z nice about blogging.
So..i guess i'll start here and see if i can keep on posting ;)

Objectives :
  • Express how i feel about things around me.
  • Share my experiences with those who even bothers to read my stuff.
  • Improve my writing skills and of course English! :)

Why do i have to have objectives in the first place?Keep coming back to understand me better ;)